Christopher Columbus

Christopher Columbus

Christopher Columbus was not a nice man. He a terrible navigator and believed Earth was not perfectly round, but “shaped like a woman’s breast”, with the nipple part, highest and closest to Heaven, being in America. Crown had promised significant lifetime pension to the first person on the voyage who sighted land, who was Martín Pinzón, the captain of the Pinta, but Columbus convinced everyone that he had sighted the land a day before but forgot to tell anyone. He enslaved the natives and set them to work digging gold. If somebody didn't make quota, he'd cut one of their hands off and make them wear it around their neck. Later, he did a brisk trade in sex slavery. He is also said to have been the one who brought Syphilis back to Europe and allowed its quick and rapid spread.

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